Creepy

This is what I was talking about the other night...

Creepy, fake, plastic and very two-dimensional. The world is a bit fucked up when the primping and preening and hair and make-up isn't enough for the child pageant entrants, and they have to get photoshopped to within an inch of their lives.

Yuck.
It's a good thing they've all got different hats on, or I wouldn't be able to tell them apart!

What am I going to do now?

Not so long ago I would never have dreamed that I would utter the following:

"No! Bad chicken!"

Needless to say, they didn't listen. I got up this morning and was walking through the dining/kitchen area, when I realised that the creature at the cat's dish was saying "bock, bock, bock" and not "meow". Yep, the chooks have discovered that they do fit through the cat hole in the back door, and seem to think that since the food people are in the house, they should be as well.

They don't seem to have done too much exploring, and I only had to clean up a couple of chicken poos on the kitchen floor...

I really don't want to have to think of new ways of chicken control.*

*Yes, we could keep them shut in the coop all day, but I think that's a bit mean. I just never expected the chooks would want to come inside.

Come on in, the water's fine

It's going to be hot again tomorrow (Sunday). If you are at a loose end, feel free to come over for a jump in the pool. The water temp is juuuuust right for lounging in for many hours at a time. Bring your Aeroguard and sunscreen, something to drink and something for the barbie. Give me a hoy if you need the address.

Orange - a rant.

What is it with all the orange, fashion designers? Eh? 

Have you not realised that not everyone has the yellow-toned skin that allows them to wear this colour? No?

Wake up to yourselves, morons! Significant numbers of people will not be able to buy clothes this season, because you fuckers have decided that all the clothes need to be orange, goddamn you! I have no desire to look sallow and ill because there is a worldwide special on orange dye. Even the pinks are orange. I don't care if you call it mango, paprika, coral, melon, spice or euphemism - it's still bloody orange.

Oh, and while you're at it; no, I don't think that $80 is a reasonable price for a nylon top with four lines of stitching in it. All of those floaty, deconstructed tops that you are churning out by the truckload* - they look good on angular people. On girls with a healthy appetite they just make the wearer look softer and rounder. How about some nice tailored tops, please? At least that way I feel a little more like I'm getting my money's worth (not, but getting closer). I'm not paying up to a day's wage for something that you've folded in half and cut a hole for the head**.

Fashion - it's completely broken***. The sad thing is that it's getting harder to shop for style, because everything seems to be following the god-awful trends.

* in orange

** and also made in orange

*** and much too orange

Today I ...

• had a moment of panic where I thought all the chooks had got out. Turns out they had just gone back to bed. Stupid chooks.
• spent far too long reading blogs and emails.
• had impromptu and nommy noodles with JD.
• discovered that Castle Towers shopping centre is MUCH better than Parra Westifield. Much.
• stayed in the air-con nearly all day. Ahhhh.
• actually found some tops that I like and that don't make me look like a sallow doughnut. Score! I now do not need to go to work naked. Wins all 'round.
• had a look in two pet shops at the puppies and the kitties. The kitties in the CT pet shop were awake - so I watched the cutest wittle fwuffy kitties SAVAGING each other. Much nomming on each others tails and ears.
• wished this stupid hot weather would bugger off. It's not even summer yet!

Hooraaaaaay!

And about bloody time too...

I have a job! It's only a six month contract, rather than an ongoing job, but it's a good start. It's also less than 5km away from home. Gotta love that.

Mind you, I am still a bit nervous - it's been more than seven years since I started a new job. It's going to be weird being the new person and having to get used to a whole new bunch of people and systems.

Wish me luck!

Laugh? I almost shat...

If you haven't seen it on the telly, you've got to have a look at the new ad for Baby Love nappies, designed to handle a "poo explosion". You will have to click on the "view our new ad" button.

Ow. Teh laughing, it hurts.

Note to self: yes, a fine dice of onion, carrot and celery does have a name (I knew it!). It's called a mirepoix. I am writing it here so that the next time I forget what's it's called (and start getting twitchy because I hate knowing that there is an answer and not being able to remember what it is) I will be able to come here and find out.

Hopefully I won't forget that it's here...

Green grows my bogling fork! Part... forgot where I'm up to.

Ok, I know I broke my promise of chook pictures in spectacular fashion, sorry. I've been a bit distracted with job interviews and anxiety on account of the same. That, coupled with the laptop moving with the speed of frozen treacle (a defrag fixed that), made me less than inclined to do much posting recently.

But, here are my girls!Now you can see why they are just "the chooks". Except for the chick on the front right - she is a bit of a stand-out. This photo is maybe a couple of weeks old now, they are starting to get their combs and wattles. They might just be real chooks soon. I just need to give the magpie who has been monstering them a boot up the date... cheeky bugger.

The veggie garden is going absolutely great guns:


We are eating quite a lot of spinach (silver beet), much to Rusty's great disappointment, the zucchinis are coming along apace, the beetroots are all going to need to be dug out soon or they will end up the size of footballs. We have also eaten:

nummy snow peas,my very first broccoli (there are now two more itty bitty baby ones on the way), as well as lettuce, radish, tomatoes, pumpkin, rocket, carrots, capsicum and cucumbers! Whew!

I am an auntie!

Hooray! 

Little Lawson was born yesterday at about 2pm, weighing 3.3kg. He shares his birthday with his dad. I get to meet him today. I am very excited!